Dec 09
13
Why Do Men (and Women) Cheat?
As a woman, I’ve often wonder what exactly makes men cheat on their wives. I think especially of men in high positions or in the public spotlight who seemingly have it all. Of course, the most recent case I’m speaking of is Tiger Woods and his (most likely) alleged affair or affairs, cheating on his gorgeous wife Elin. But it doesn’t end with Tiger.
The list of powerful or celebrity men who have scads of money, a beautiful house and wife and kids, and just a lot of “stuff”, both material and immaterial, goes on and on. And yet, there they find themselves with a justifiably angry wife and a smashed window, and a veritable publicity nightmare. And they deserve it. Why did they cheat in the first place?
They should know that they are high profile people and the odds of getting caught are much higher, and they also have a lot of public opinion that can go bad and a lot of endorsements they can lose. Not to mention the self respect they lose from both men and women who may have looked at them as positive role models for their kids, or heck, for themselves.
I’ve heard a lot of reasons on why both men and women cheat on their spouses. It ranges everything from sexual dissatisfaction and boredom, to overall lack of interest in the marriage and the person. Problems in the marriage and lack of communication is often cited, and often there is also an issue where the spouse who cheats feels unappreciated, unnoticed, and generally taken for granted. Many times spouses say that they still love their spouse, they just wanted to feel that excitement and newness, that they were seduced, or that they simply felt that their spouse did not appreciate them any more.
Sorry, but all these reasons really suck, especially if you genuinely still love and respect your spouse. I understand that there are cases where people fall out of love, and to a certain extent I do believe that all is fair in love and war. But let’s face it, the majority of affairs have less to do with “love” than they do with lust and instant gratification and some sort of displaced sense of satisfaction and appreciation.
I think that if you truly love and respect someone, you will be open about your feelings and you will both work on that relationship in the necessary ways to reach an understanding so that you both DON’T feel like straying. After all, that’s what marriage is, it’s a commitment, it’s trust and it’s up to the couple to keep it an open, trusting relationship. Guys, I’d love to hear some of your points of view. I’ve heard a lot of men who get their hearts broken by their lovers or partners, and I know you have an opinion!
